My whole life I have looked like a teapot, you know, short and stout. The other day I was at the gym and I was approached by this trainer who told me that if I signed up for her Pilates class I could have the long and lean body of a dancer. I have always wanted to look like dancer.
My question is, is this true? Can Pilates make me look like a Dancer?
Signed Sincerely,
Mrs. Potts
Dear Mrs. Potts,
The other day I was in the international aisle at my local Shop Rite picking up some Thai Chili Sauce. This stuff is fantastic! I put it on my steamed chicken and rice which gives it a little bit of that General Tso's flavor minus about one thousand calories.
(I love this guy's chicken but if I eat it too often my butt start's to jiggle)
So anyway, as I was heading towards the Asian section I ran into this tiny little lady, she couldn't have been more than a couple inches shy of four and a half feet. She was shopping in the Goya section which is right next to the source of my spicy goodness. Per my usual I got to talking to her and it turns out she is from Guatemala. She told me she loves our Shop Rite because it has a wide selection of products that typically she can only find in South and Central American specialty shops. Awesome for her!
What was awesome for me is standing next to this woman I felt like a giant! And this got me to thinking about how cool it would be to be really tall. How awesome it would feel to be able to literally look down on everybody without neccessarliy having to think less of them.
But then reality set in. On a good day I am five foot ten. Now while this certainly doesn't make me Herve Villechaize it doesn't make me Wilt Chamberlin either.
(These guys formed one badassed duo! R.I.P. both of them)
The bottom line is my body is what my body is and that includes my warts (I mean that figuratively), blemishes, vertical challenges and all. I can change that no more than anybody can change the sun and the moon and the stars.
And so is the rub with body types. Just because professional dancers tend to have long and lean bodies doesn't mean that by dancing you will have one too. And just because professional dancers use Pilates to strengthen and protect their core from a variety of high level dance induced injuries doesn't mean you will be shopping in the young misses section any time soon either. Don't feel bad though. Do you know how many tall people comment on my emerging bald spot everyday?
Think of it this way. Could you imagine if a basketball coach approached me and said that by teaching me how to play his sport I could be taller because guys in the N.B.A. happen to be tall? Of course not, that is insane. The typical player in the N.B.A. is tall because those are the body types that tend to excel at that sport. The same thing goes for professional dancers. That body type, the long and lean one, is the type that excels at that given profession. It is only honed, not created, through decades of training which includes things like Pilates.
(Think of me more like the guy on the right versus the guy on the left. Minus the seventy two tons of steroids of course)
Now don't get me wrong. I think Pilates is wonderful. I include a lot of Pilates based mat exercises in both my own routine as well as that of my clients. They are great for core strength, breath and body control and nothing beats them for pelvic floor strengthening (ask any woman who has had a baby and also jumped on a trampoline about the importance of that last one).
Just as your height is fixed at a certain age so is your body type. Some people tend to be short and thick and some people tend to be long and lean. When people ask me what I do for a living I say that a big part of being a personal trainer is giving people good, safe and honest advice on how to make their bodies stronger so that they can live more fulfilling lives. I also tell them that a big part of my job is also about teaching people how to learn to manage expectations.
(One of these, or some combination thereof, is your body type. You were given these cards a long time ago. You can either learn to enjoy what you have and play the game or you can read'em and weep. It is up to you.)
No trainer, pilates coach or anybody for that matter minus Merlin the magician will ever be able to give you the skinny body of a dancer if that is not the way you are built. They may promise it to you but that is because they are either uninformed or they are an unethical piece of poop. My advice would be to eat right, exercise and learn to love the body you have, not the one you wish you did.
But then again, what the hell do I know.
Yours in Chocolate Chip Cookies,
Mike Cruickshank
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