What I Ate 1/20

Meal 1:
Protein Shake = 2 scoops chocolate protein powder/Beverly Ultimate Muscle Protein mixed with ice and water
(I have been asked why I use this stuff as in "what does it do for me" of which the answer is "very little". All Protein powder does is offer you a convenient alternative to real food. It is in no way better nor does it have anything superior in it that will make you get any stronger or leaner any faster than if you were able to eat real food like chicken, steak, eggs etc. In fact I find real food works much better espcially when it comes to digestability as in you don't fart as much when you eat real food. Anybody who tells you different is probably looking for an angle more than they are telling you the truth. Either that or they don't care what you smell like nor do they have to wash your underwear on a regular basis but so I digress. Remember, there is no shortcut, their is no special secret, only the reality that there will always be somebody out there trying to make a profit from peoples desperate attempt to find a easier way to do things.)

Two slices of wheat toast with a little smuckers jelly

1 Vitamin Shoppe (there's that damn "E" again!) Ultimate Man Vitamin
(I have also been asked why I use this vitamin and does it really make me an ultimate man. Well let's just say that if Ponce De Leon searched for the fountain of youth, I am currently searching for the fountain of a little better than mediocrity so no, it doesn not make me an ultimate man. I only chose this vitamin because the vitamin shoppe is right across from the parking lot from home depot and this particular supplement is usually on sale and unlike most multivitamins it doesn't put me on the toilet as a result of nutrient overkill. So maybe in a roundabout kinda way it does make me a little more "ultimate" than the broke dude who when he is not stuck in the bathroom drives around new jersey all day buying vitamins.)

Meal 2:
200 grams marinated round steak (I chose to put steak in this meal because I used my shake for breakfast. I did this because I have been farty lately, and when I say farty I mean imagine if you had a broccolli and cheese omlette and washed it down with a pint of old school Bud. I think it is from all the eggs I have been eating every day. I have cut back to eggs 3 days a week and there has been a definite change in my natural gas output so much so that British Petroleum has cancelled their attempts to buy my butt)
1 apple
2 oz raisins (I chose these fruits because they are what I had in the house. There is no deeper meaning behind them).

Meal 3:
1 can of tuna (7 oz. of albacore because it is cheap and convenient and I am cheap and lazy)
1 baked potato
1 cup mixed vegetables (aspargus, broccoli, corn/once again their is no secret to this combination outside of the fact that it was what was on sale at BJ's Warehouse in Hamilton N.J.)

Meal 4:
180 grams round steak
4 quaker cheddar rice cakes (this meal is easy, quick, convenient, I already had the meat made and just pulled the rice cakes out of the pantry. I didn't have time to make a big meal because I was going out that night and this fit the bill perfectly. Meal = 1 carb and 1 protein with the occasional vegetable thrown in)

Meal 5 (eaten at the wells fargo arena at the flyers game)
1 Roast Pork "Italian" sandwhich comprised of roast pork, sharp provolone, broccolli rabe and stuffed with potato chips. Any of the pork, provolone, or brocolli that fell out of the oversized sandwhich was scooped up with the remaining chips at the bottom of the box the sandwhich came in. It's kind like pork nachos and it is awesome.
(Now before you diet nutjobs get your underwear in a bunch about a personal trainer eating such "bad" food let me jump the gun by telling you to go to hell right now. As will be stated in my next update, there is a deep, well thought out reason I eat this kind of food but the bottom line is that if you don't ever "come up for air" I don't really see the point in eating "healthy" all the time unless you have some kind of psychological illness which compulses you to eat "healthy" all the time. Either that or you are under the direct care of a physician who for whatever reason warns against it.

1 Large DIET COKE (Of course one would wash such an impressive meal down with DIET coke. I mean what else would one drink. That regular soda will kill ya don't ya know.)


Yours in Chocolate Chip Cookies,

Mike Cruickshank